Saturday, October 30, 2010

Reality Bites

So I wake up this morning all motivated to spend a day round the house, tidy a few things, mow the lawn, you know - the normal day to day stuff.

Anyways I got dressed in denim 3/4 pants and a red singlet. I thought, excellent - time to take some photos of me wearing colour. No black to hide behind. So I take said photos.


Conclusion - I hate colour and I HATE the reality of what my outsides look like. Reality Bites HARD.

So because I'm a masachist (?) I have posted them on my photo page so everyone can see how bad the colour test photo results were...

I know in the long run it will be a good marker for me to track my progress but today it hurts.

I am honestly one of those people who thought they were quite normal, a bit chubby but more curvy not obese....until I caught a glimpse of my reflection. That alone could make me not want to leave the house. So the fact that I am brave enough to posts these photos is proving to be good for my accountability. How does someone who plays sport 3 nights a week become like this? Obviously I eat way too much of all the wrong things...Duh!

I need to be accountable for letting myself get like this. On the outside I am unrecognisable to me. I look at my reflection thinking 'this can't be me?' 'surely I'm not THAT big!'

I totally understand the concept of wanting my outsides to match my insides.

Well YES I AM. The time has come to be honest and accountable. I have let myself get like this and I will fix it. The band will be my 'side-kick' on my journey. My band will tell me when enough's enough. My band will not stop me making bad choices - only I CAN DO THAT.

I am ready - Bring it on!


  1. I know exactly how you feel! I watch Biggest Loser and think, how do they let them selves get that big. Then I see a girl the same weight as me, and think "no way that is what I look like" well, guess what? it is! Don't worry, we got this!

  2. Congrats on your decision to be banded, I never regretted it.

  3. Kelly I DEFINITELY know how this feels!! Usually I think I'm fine, and then today I saw a video of myself and I was like....Oh. Shit. How did that happen?
    You are sooo brave to put photos up of yourself like that, I am way to chicken. Good on you for having that confidence and being that honest with yourself. Not long until your op now :)
    I can't wait for my first fill, I need to loose this weight!!

  4. Me too I know how you feel girl! And yes YOU CAN DO IT!!