Tuesday, October 12, 2010

What do I really want?

I have been thinking about what I really want lately and have updated my non-scale goals to reflect on what these things are.

I am hoping with time (and the band!) I will be able to achieve most (if not all) of these goals. I feel that if I don't write these down then I run the risk of settling. There is only one thing in my life I feel like I have ever settled for ... my weight.

I don't want to settle anymore. I want to reach out and grab the bull by the horn (so to speak!), I want to live again, I want to feel free from this weight, I want to let it all go. I have not yet discovered what it is that keeps me holding on to this fat, I don't like it, I don't like the way it makes me feel, so why in the hell do I hold on to it so ferociously?

Things I hate about my fatness...
My knees hurt when climbing stairs, when playing netball and basketball, when standing for too long...
I don't fit into clothes I want to fit into.
I can't run.
I can't jog!
I can't play on the playground equipment with my kids as I fear it will collapse.
I don't want to be a bad role model for my kids.
I don't want my kids to be embarrassed by their FAT mum

This is not everything but I think the list could go on and on and on ... you get the drift ...

So here are a few things that I DO want.... I have even tried to categorise them!

Clothing Goals
Fit into Australian size 20 pair of jeans
Fit into Australian size 18 pair of jeans
Fit into Australian size 16 pair of jeans
Fit into Australian size 14 pair of jeans
Fit into Australian size 12 pair of jeans!
Wear a dress and not feel like I am wearing a tent
Be game enough to wear leggings and a long shirt combo!
Buy a nice pair of Knee High boots and not have to buy the larger calf variety!

Body Goals
Being able to SEE my collar bones
Being able to feel my hip bones
I want to run into people I haven't seen in a while and them not recognise me
Being able to walk around the house in just a towel and have it completely cover me
Having a space between my thighs!!

Emotional Goals
I want to feel beautiful when hubby looks at me - no matter how much he says it I don't believe it. - I WANT to believe it - I want to FEEL it.
I want to be able to eat a dessert and not feel guilt
Being able to walk into a room and not feel like the biggest person in the room
Being able to look into the mirror and/or reflection and see that I AM 'normal'
Being able to walk down the street and feel that people aren't staring at my FAT
Being able to eat a chocolate or icecream and not see/feel people watching me eat

Cheers for now


  1. I think these are some good goals you have,and a lot of them I share. Don't worry, you will get there, and I hope to be right beside you sharing it with you!

  2. you will get there trust me... i didnt think id be able to loose the ammount i did in the time frame it has been but it can be done with some strong willpower and even without the willpower you can still rock the weightloss :D

  3. You can do it! It's so exciting seeing the weight come off! It's an amazing process... :)

  4. These are AMAZING goals! You will definitely do it. We'll do this together. LOVE your post! :)

  5. What a set of excellent goals! You will meet them one by one and in sets as you walk with the band. I wish you great luck and success!

    Thanks for coming over to my blog by the way!!