Friday, April 15, 2011
Scared and hormonal!
I am still scared that I am going to fail. It has been playing on my mind since I decided to go ahead with the surgery. This is the first time I think I have ever written it down for the world to read. I was inspired by the YouTube video that Lap Band Girl posted today. That guy had a lot of good solid advice. I am choosing to take with me 2 main suggestions. Document my journey. Good and bad. I want this to be an honest account of how this process is affecting me, how it is changing my perspective, how it is changing my view on life. I don't particularly want to document what food I eat everyday etc, but from time to time I will certainly check in to how I am assisting my band with nutrition. The second thing is photos and measurements. Today is 5 months post op. It's gone fast and I feel like I am not achieving the results I should be. I then have an internal debate about my progress being good enough. In my head I know it is ok but my heart knows that I can put in more effort. I will be taking my monthly comparison pic tomorrow and will also do some measurements and update them on my blog. OK so before I let out all my hormonal frustrations I will leave you on a positive note - I felt skinny today. I know I am not skinny but today I FELT skinny. That's an achievement in itself!!!
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I have the same anxieties some times to, especially now that my loss is slowing some. I know I have done great so far, but it doesn't change those feelings completely. I know what u mean about feeling skinny some days. I'm far from being skinny, but some days I do feel it!
ReplyDeleteI think failure is our biggest fear. I know that i have seen that fear come up again and again on the blogs. It is only natural I think as we have all had so much failure with other diets. We all hope that this is the answer but there is a little piece of us all scared to death that we have been duped into doing yet another diet that wont work.
ReplyDeleteEven at goal I have my bad days where that little devil on my shoulder says: sure..i got to goal but will I stay? I am not sure if it will ever go away.
16+ kg. in 5 months is AWESOME!! It's a marathon, not a sprint! Just keep at it!
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone! I think lots of us have these doubts. Despite losing weight quite well, I still worry that I will be one of the ones that it won't work for, that I will lack the control and finishing power to get to goal, that I will get to goal, but not stay there. So many of us have a history of failure when it comes to our weight - it's hard to believe this time it will be different. But you're doing great, and there is NO reason why you won't succeed!
ReplyDeleteI hear you. It is very hard sometimes not to compare your weight loss to others (especially those who have lost so quickly!). I'm almost 8 months out and "only" down 35 lbs. But...I know that had I not had this surgery, I would definitely not be down this, in fact, I would probably weigh MORE than I did when I started! So I try to just be happy with what I'm doing. It's hard, but we can't beat ourselves up because we "don't compare" with others!
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